Top 10: Pros Of A COVID Wedding
by: David Levin
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10. The schadenfreude you get watching the bride realize the magical day she’s dreamed about for years has 20 people and it’s in the only place that was open, a quarter-capacity Applebee’s.
9. You won’t get drunk as quickly as you used to thanks to building up a tolerance in lockdown.
8. You don’t have to pretend to care about where the honeymoon will be because where the fuck can they even go?
7. There’s less of a chance that the bar will be a cash bar.
6. The bridesmaids can all have matching masks.
5. If you’re making a toast, less people means less pressure and you can hire a second-rate company like The Comedy Consultants to help you.
4. The odds are higher that you may actually be the best dancer.
3. Less people means more pieces of cake for you.
2. Just cough slightly and there won’t be any competition to catch the bouquet.
1. Capacity limits mean you can not invite all of the creepy cousins.
David Levin is a comedian and regular contributor to thecomedyconsultant.com. For more, check his page out on YouTube.
Need help with your upcoming Toast? Contact us at TheComedyConsultant@gmail.com. Our highly effective process consists of writing a number of jokes, having you highlight the ones you like best, and then shaping it into a more formal toast format. Click for Reviews and to see sample Toasts we’ve written and/or performed. We got this!
3 thoughts to “Top 10: Pros Of A COVID Wedding”
How hard do you have to cough to keep them from throwing the bouquet at all??
Best dancer at an Applebees wedding without the creepy cousins. Hoorah for COVID weddings. Funny stuff😂
Haha Thanks!! Hope everyone’s COVID wedding is a smashing success and enjoy the extra cake!